The CBS show Sunday Morning always has a profile of a famous author. The authors never really know how to explain their success. Needless to say, it's my goal to be profiled on Sunday Morning. I have no idea what I'm going to say either.
On today's show, they had a feature on Nora Roberts. It felt more like an episode of MTV's Cribs, then an inside look at an author's success.
The most memorable profile was the one Bill Geist did about the grandma who wrote romantic stories with explicit sex scenes. The camera did a close up of an embarrassed Geist literally blushing as the woman read a passage from the book. The author demonstrated the mechanics of a three-way with Barbie and Ken dolls on a bed. Geist has been a network correspondent for years, yet looked positively mortified. Needless to say, the author didn't reveal her literary techniques, if any.
I did enjoy Stephen King's profile. King is someone that I wish I knew MORE about. We can always imagine King really sitting at a typewriter at an abandoned Colorado resort typing "All work and no play makes Stephen a dull boy." (If I have to explain that reference, you don't know Stephen King). I do wonder if he sold his soul for a career, literally and figuratively.
I don't know if they've had a profile on the author of 50 Shades of Grey. I would turn 50 shades of blue.
Best case scenario, everything comes together in the next few months, and I hit the best seller list. I would not wait to show the reporter my new house in Santa Fe, I would show them the messy place where I compose my stuff on an old HP laptop. If Bill Geist asked me what the secret to my success, I would tell him that my entire career was coming down to this moment.
And that would be true.