The Academy Awards nominated today. I once vowed that I would win one in writing, preferably in Best Adapted Screenplay for adapting my own novel into a screenplay. Could that still happpen? Well, I haven't given up yet. Remember the "secret" where you are supposed to visualize a moment and that will happen? Well accepting an Oscar is my secret.
By telling you, did I just ruin it?
We do have a cat named Oscar. My wife named him. He has a tendency to block the TV screen when he wants to be fed.
My instructor at Film School won on Oscar and I did get to hold one in my hand. It is far heavier than you expect and I nearly dropped it. That might have caused a dent in the floor. Unfortunately, I do visualize dropping the statue as I accept it. I can live with that.
Another film school instructor also won an award for screenwriting. He told me that I should go on and do things. He gave me a D, but that's another story.
None of my friends have actually won an Oscar, but a few have been thanked in speeches. That gives me two degrees of separation. It gives YOU three degrees as you are reading a column of someone who knows someone who has won an Oscar. I don't know any of the nominees this year, in any category, but that isn't a bad thing.
My cousin who looks exactly like me, but younger and thinner, won an Emmy for Screenwriting. I don't hate him, but I do wish he would return my phone calls.
I already know what I would say in my acceptance speech. I would thank everyone who believed in me, but more important, I would thank everyone who didn't. On second thought, I would not be harsh in a speech. I would be more like Sally Field when she said "You like me! You like me!"
I do plan on watching the Oscars. Who knows? Maybe someday I will be there. Hopefully Oscar won't block the screen.
You wouldn't drop the Oscar!
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